The next day, May 2nd, I took a group to a training in Edwards, IL. During the lunch break, I logged in to my email to send off the message that Justin and I had discussed. In my inbox was an email from the executive director of CHI. We had received emails from CHI before, but they all dealt with logistics, stats, program updates etc… and I had never gotten one from this man. I decided to read the message before composing my email to our rep to let her know that we felt that we needed to change our minds. Here are a few of the lines from this unexpected email…
“Over the years we have seen changes and cycles in the wonderful world of adoption. It is one of the noblest works of this worn and weary world for a family to open their hearts and home to a child who is going to be as their own flesh and blood. This special world is filled with special people – who sometime need to be encouraged to stay to the course and believe for the highest help when the wait is long and the spirit is weary. This is about a CHILD. A child who waits just as you do – waiting through many cold and lonely nights with no mama or daddy to cuddle and comfort. That child needs you – but it can never happen without courage and patience. I used to say to parents at the beginning of their adoption journey: “There are three things you need. The first is Patience. The second is PATIENCE. The third is…" well, you know. A noble work requires nobility and perseverance and I hope that you can draw on those resources however you find them.”
My heart skipped a beat and my eyes filled with tears. The things that Justin and I were so worked up over had nothing to do with a CHILD. We were worried about the financial aspect, the long process, the paperwork, the logistics. I decided that I needed to wait to send the email to the rep. I had to pull myself back together for the remainder of the training. I could always send the message later that night from home right?
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