I have noticed lately that as I run into various people that they are naturally curious about the adoption process and how we chose to go down this path. The ‘brave’ ones that ask the questions that are on their minds usually preface it with something along these lines… “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want.” Or “This may be too personal, but…” I just want to let anyone know that reads this that Justin and I are both very happy to answer any questions that you may have. We are not offended by them - as long as you are polite of course :o) and enjoy telling our family’s story. There are some details we have not posted on this blog. I try to be an open book to help others and to document our journey, but I have deliberately left off a couple of key things. Why international adoption? Why Russia? Why not have another child ‘naturally’? These are all questions we are very comfortable answering, but they are not questions I am comfortable blogging about. We never want it to appear that we feel that our decisions would be right for everyone. We have made our decisions based on what we feel is best for our family. This is not to say our way is better AT ALL. It is just better for us. So in order to do our best not to offend, confuse, or hurt anyone we have opted to not write about those things online. If you see either of us and you have questions feel free to fire away. You may regret that you did so though because we may talk your ear off and tell you wayyyy more than you wanted to know! If you aren’t in the area and you would like to chat, just send me an email and we can communicate that way or we can exchange phone numbers, Skype accounts or IM accounts (gotta love technology!).
Heather's email address: jnhoverstreet@yahoo.com
Justin’s email address: justinoverstreet75@yahoo.com
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Saturday, December 27, 2008
Christmas Marathon
We have 4 Christmas gatherings down and 2 more to go. We have had a great time with our families so far and Brady and Madison love staying up late. One highlight for me was being at my mom and dad’s house. They have a wall of pictures with the grandchildren on it. They had printed the picture we emailed out of Blake, framed it, and added it to the wall. It is great to see. In a way it is kind of ‘weird’. Our feelings and love for Blake are so real and yet the situation doesn’t seem real at all. No one but Justin and I have even laid on this lil guy. Hopefully, sooner than later, that will all change and everyone else can see what a sweet boy he is!
Here are a few Christmas photos to share.
Brady and Madison on Christmas Eve.
Our little poser!
Brady with his Harry Potter nesting dolls from Blake.
Madison with her 101 Dalmation nesting dolls from Blake.
Juatin with his 1985 Chicago Bear Superbowl Champions nesting dolls from Blake. (He was such a good sport playing along with my picture taking!)
Here are a few Christmas photos to share.
Brady and Madison on Christmas Eve.
Our little poser!
Brady with his Harry Potter nesting dolls from Blake.
Madison with her 101 Dalmation nesting dolls from Blake.
Juatin with his 1985 Chicago Bear Superbowl Champions nesting dolls from Blake. (He was such a good sport playing along with my picture taking!)
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Merry Christmas!
We want to wish each and every one of you a very Merry Christmas. No matter what trials and tribulations we are facing there is always reason to celebrate Jesus’ birthday. We thought we would share with you our new family tradition for Christmas morning. We got the idea from our dear friends Chris and Rachel Smith. On Christmas morning Brady and Madison will open their stocking gifts while Justin and I are attempting to get our eyes open. After that we will sit together and read the Christmas Story. We then will share with Brady and Madison the meaning of communion. We will drink grape juice and eat crackers to remind us of the Lord’s Supper. We will share the things we are thankful for, what we are looking forward to in the upcoming year - a time for reflection. This really helps keep the day in prospective.
We are saying a special prayer today for our friends – The Pitman Family and the Martin’s (the Cajuns). Both families are due to arrive home today – Christmas Eve. We sure hope that they have no travel delays are able to spend their first Christmas as a family in their own homes.
Safe travels to all.
Love,
Justin, Heather, Brady, Madison & Blake
We are saying a special prayer today for our friends – The Pitman Family and the Martin’s (the Cajuns). Both families are due to arrive home today – Christmas Eve. We sure hope that they have no travel delays are able to spend their first Christmas as a family in their own homes.
Safe travels to all.
Love,
Justin, Heather, Brady, Madison & Blake
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Attitude Adjustment Needed
Justin and I have come to the realization that if we are going to survive this wait we are going to have to have an attitude adjustment. We have found ourselves over the past week becoming bitter toward the adoption process. We remind ourselves constantly that our journey has been so much shorter than many of the other waiting families, and we thank God for that daily. But now there is a face to this process. There is a little guy who has stolen our hearts. Before meeting him, we looked at the paperwork as a test of our endurance. We felt we were being challenged to see if we were up to the trials and tribulations that we would soon face. Now we don’t want to play the game. We don’t want our endurance tested. We want our family to be together. When dealing with state, federal, and international governments families deal with a tremendous amount of red tape. At this point, it is red tape that has no bearing on your ability to parent a child. All of those issues should have been hammered out in the homestudy and prior to getting a referral. Now the paperwork seems pointless and meaningless other than the fact that that is what it takes to get Blake home.
So when Justin and I began our conversation about what we needed to do to change our attitude, we realized we can not be negative and cynical for the next couple, few, several, whatever months while we are waiting. It is not fair to Brady and Madison or to those around us. So where are these strong feelings coming from? Well, we both agreed that something has happened that neither one of us fully expected. We read in several books and heard from many people that you will not necessarily fall in love with your child right away. It can often times take awhile for love to enter your heart. Justin and I fully expected that to be the case. We expected to care for the lil guy. We expected to feel protective of him. We even expected to feel an attachment to some degree. But we are both in total awe of the love that has filled our hearts. We love Blake so much. It is truly like he is the missing member of our family. As if God was just waiting for Justin and I to realize that we had work to do and He helped Blake wait for us to prepare our hearts. We are so grateful to feel such a connection. We know that we are very fortunate and that not everyone can understand. To be honest, we don’t fully understand. But we do know that the pain and heartache we feel now will be short-lived in comparison to the years of joy we are going to have with Blake as part of our family.
So we will get through the next several months and we will pass the numerous tests that are put before us. It is our prayer that we do so by letting God’s love for us shine brightly even through the dark times. We hope that this entry finds everyone staying warm. It is about -3 degrees here with a wind chill factor of about -30. Time for some hot cocoa.
So when Justin and I began our conversation about what we needed to do to change our attitude, we realized we can not be negative and cynical for the next couple, few, several, whatever months while we are waiting. It is not fair to Brady and Madison or to those around us. So where are these strong feelings coming from? Well, we both agreed that something has happened that neither one of us fully expected. We read in several books and heard from many people that you will not necessarily fall in love with your child right away. It can often times take awhile for love to enter your heart. Justin and I fully expected that to be the case. We expected to care for the lil guy. We expected to feel protective of him. We even expected to feel an attachment to some degree. But we are both in total awe of the love that has filled our hearts. We love Blake so much. It is truly like he is the missing member of our family. As if God was just waiting for Justin and I to realize that we had work to do and He helped Blake wait for us to prepare our hearts. We are so grateful to feel such a connection. We know that we are very fortunate and that not everyone can understand. To be honest, we don’t fully understand. But we do know that the pain and heartache we feel now will be short-lived in comparison to the years of joy we are going to have with Blake as part of our family.
So we will get through the next several months and we will pass the numerous tests that are put before us. It is our prayer that we do so by letting God’s love for us shine brightly even through the dark times. We hope that this entry finds everyone staying warm. It is about -3 degrees here with a wind chill factor of about -30. Time for some hot cocoa.
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Getting Our Bearings
So the common question is what now? Now we wait. We have a slew of paperwork that we must complete. I actually don’t know why we have to complete some of this now. It seems that these are things that should have been done prior to meeting any children, but we’ll play the paperwork game if that is what it takes. We have to have an FBI background check as well as one from the state. Those take about 3-4 weeks to get back to us. We have to have ANOTHER medical evaluation and blood tests. Those are only valid for 3 months so if you do them too early you have to get them updated, but you want to have them done so that they are not waiting on your paperwork. Quite an interesting procedure really. In addition we have to have a psychological evaluation done. Funny that people don’t have to do any of this to bear children huh? We are fortunate that there is a man in town that will get us in in January. We found that many of the doctors are scheduling into March and April for new patients. We don’t have that long to wait so we were relieved to find another person in Macomb that is qualified to do the paperwork. Anyway, many of the documents are a repeat of the things we did for our homestudy. The biggest hurdle is that we are waiting on a couple of documents to arrive from the Vlad region for us to sign, notarize and return. Our agency is closed for business from December 22-January 3. And then the Russian New Year holiday is celebrated January 1-5 and then the Russian Orthodox Christmas is on January 7th. So they will return to work on about January 12th. Now that we have met the little guy and have connected with him, waiting is so much harder. Justin is anxious to travel and return before planting season. Brady and Madison are beside themselves with anticipation. They are so sweet and love to look at the pictures we brought back. We explained to them that when we go for trip number two that we will be gone about 3 times as long as we were on this last trip. The families we met were averaging about 25 days away from home. Brady says, “Ohhh that’s ok Mom. It will all be worth it. You will get to bring Blake home.” Kids are so understanding. Also they both want to make sure that everyone knows they are getting a little brother. We wrapped a couple of Christmas presents (I am soooo far behind), and I told Brady to write on the tag that the gift was from he and Madison. He said that he was going to put from Blake, Brady, and Madison and that Blake’s name would be first so that everyone could see it. So Justin and I have been trying to prepare them. Not squash their enthusiasm, but prepare them that a little brother will get in their things; and will need a lot of help; and will take quite a bit of attention; etc… They just say yeah yeah mom we know – we know.
In order to survive the holiday craziness, keep our sanity, and be cheery for the Christmas season, Justin and I are trying to remove ‘extra’ items from the plate so that we can avoid feeling so overwhelmed. That means no Christmas treat baking this year. Also I am not going to attend WIU graduation this Saturday so that we can finish our shopping and getting our house back in order. I have also decided not to do Christmas cards this year. I am thinking maybe we’ll do like an Easter or Fourth of July cards instead :o) We try to catch ourselves when we start to complain. We have so much to be grateful for and the things we complain about are just small details in life. We just hope that things continue to go as smoothly as possible and that we can bring Blake home sooner than later.
In order to survive the holiday craziness, keep our sanity, and be cheery for the Christmas season, Justin and I are trying to remove ‘extra’ items from the plate so that we can avoid feeling so overwhelmed. That means no Christmas treat baking this year. Also I am not going to attend WIU graduation this Saturday so that we can finish our shopping and getting our house back in order. I have also decided not to do Christmas cards this year. I am thinking maybe we’ll do like an Easter or Fourth of July cards instead :o) We try to catch ourselves when we start to complain. We have so much to be grateful for and the things we complain about are just small details in life. We just hope that things continue to go as smoothly as possible and that we can bring Blake home sooner than later.
Monday, December 15, 2008
Still adjusting
We did make it home safe and sound on Saturday. We are having a very difficult time adjusting back to our time zone. I will try to update everyone as soon as possible on how things are going. We do not have any idea when we will return to get the lil guy. It can take anywhere from 2 to 6 months. We have another round of paperwork to complete and also documents that have to be completed by various parties in Russia. I hope to write more soon.
Brady and Madison made us a sign with a little help from NaNa to welcome us home. It was great to see them!
Brady and Madison made us a sign with a little help from NaNa to welcome us home. It was great to see them!
Friday, December 12, 2008
Mixed emotions
It has been an exhausting day. I am sitting on the floor of the Seoul airport completely worn out. I am so excited to return home and be with Brady and Madison. We long to be surrounded by our own culture – people who speak the same as we do, the holiday cheer, etc… But still our heart aches for the little guy today. It was yet another amazing visit. I believe I mentioned yesterday that we were all sick of the visiting room. God must have known we were at our wits end. When we got to the baby home today we found out that the room was having a window repaired and we would have to go to the ‘gymnasium’ to play. Yahooooo. We were super excited to see the other parts of the baby home and have a different backdrop for all of our snapshots. While we were up stairs, another group of children came up to play. It was good for us to see the other children and how our lil guy interacted with them. First he gently backed them all away from us. He was not interested in sharing us with them. He then stacked all of the items we were playing with right between Justin and I. Once he was sure the things were safe from the other kids he went over and played with them. He was very gentle and gave one boy a hug.
Lana, our interpreter, came back in a bit earlier as we had requested. She helped us explain that we would be coming back for him soon. She took time to go through the photo album with him again and spoke to him about Brady and Madison. Lana explained that we were going home to get his room ready for him and to prepare Brady and Madison for his arrival and that we would be back soon. We were able to leave the album, a little blanket and pillow that my mom had made for him, and a disposable camera for the caregivers to take pictures for us. There is no guarantee that we will get these items back but we hope so. He gave us big hugs as we left. I turned my back so that he did not see the tears running down my face. I already miss him so much.
Back at the hotel we said our goodbyes to the Pittman family. They will always have a special place in our heart. They were our go-to guys for many of our questions. Their children are so great and are lucky to have Becky and Eric as parents. Justin and I adore Max. We think we were so drawn to him because we loved to listen to him speak Russian and because he is only 5 we could actually understand a few words :o) We had lots of good laughs. First time parents are a good source of entertainment! We also said goodbye to the Cajuns – Carol and Carl and their son. We look forward to staying in touch with them and watching their son grow over the next several years. It was a special experience to have spent time with parents of a child from our guy’s same group.
So the wait begins again. We will be back to the frustrating paper race and having our patience tested. We will pray for our little guy night and day and think about him constantly. Hug your family members today and remember how special the people God has placed in your life really are!
Lana, our interpreter, came back in a bit earlier as we had requested. She helped us explain that we would be coming back for him soon. She took time to go through the photo album with him again and spoke to him about Brady and Madison. Lana explained that we were going home to get his room ready for him and to prepare Brady and Madison for his arrival and that we would be back soon. We were able to leave the album, a little blanket and pillow that my mom had made for him, and a disposable camera for the caregivers to take pictures for us. There is no guarantee that we will get these items back but we hope so. He gave us big hugs as we left. I turned my back so that he did not see the tears running down my face. I already miss him so much.
Back at the hotel we said our goodbyes to the Pittman family. They will always have a special place in our heart. They were our go-to guys for many of our questions. Their children are so great and are lucky to have Becky and Eric as parents. Justin and I adore Max. We think we were so drawn to him because we loved to listen to him speak Russian and because he is only 5 we could actually understand a few words :o) We had lots of good laughs. First time parents are a good source of entertainment! We also said goodbye to the Cajuns – Carol and Carl and their son. We look forward to staying in touch with them and watching their son grow over the next several years. It was a special experience to have spent time with parents of a child from our guy’s same group.
So the wait begins again. We will be back to the frustrating paper race and having our patience tested. We will pray for our little guy night and day and think about him constantly. Hug your family members today and remember how special the people God has placed in your life really are!
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Vlad Day 6 – Visit number 4
Yesterday was another great visit. I think we are all getting tired of the visiting room though. It is causing us to get very creative in coming up with new games to play. One of the caregivers walked through just after the lil guy had done something really neat and Justin and I were saying high piat (piat is 5 in Russian). He loves to give us high piats and low piats. The caregiver must have thought this was cute or we were completely nuts because she got a huge smile as she left the room. So today was his day for manipulating me a bit :o) He loves to drink water from a water bottle we have kept in our bag. From what we gather from other families, the children in the baby homes and orphanages do not get a lot to drink. They pretty much drink with their meals and that is it. This of course is to keep bathroom trips and wetting to a minimum. So we try not to let him have very much of the water. Well he picks up the bottle and looks at me for more. I say Nyet (no) and shake my head. He says Spaseeba MaMa (thank you MaMa) and tilts his head and gives me a grin with a twinkle in his eye. How can I resist that!?! He knows how to play us.
After leaving, Lana asked us if we had made our final decision to adopt him. We of course said absolutely and that we would just go ahead and bring him home now. She giggled and said that that is what everyone says. I have no doubt! We then had to go back downtown to the city of Vlad to go to the notary. This was to make it official that we will adopt him and to sign a very important paper that will take him off the registry so that he will not be adopted by another family. Lana took us to a few shopping places downtown and then we treated her and the driver to Baskin Robbins. She said, “The we-there not so good for ice cream.” Justin explained that the weather is ALWAYS good for ice cream. She couldn’t argue with that.
I guess we will not be able to share his Russian or English names on the blog until everything is final in court after trip two. Sorry about that!
Today is our last day here. We will leave in a bit to visit the little guy. We will work with Lana to try to explain what is happening the best we can to a three year old. I am praying to God this morning that he give me the strength to keep my emotions in tack until after we leave the baby home, and also that he gives the lil guy peace in knowing that we will return soon. He knows no life other than the baby home. He has never spent one minute outside of institutional living. For the next couple/few months, we pray that he falls back into his routine and he is content. Of course selfishly we would like to think that he will miss us, but for his sake we hope that he does not.
We leave Vlad today to fly to Seoul then to LA then to Chicago. We will get on the morning train in Chicago and arrive home in Macomb at 10:30ish a.m. on Saturday – assuming we have no traveling drama. It will be a hard day for us, but we know that we are coming back to two amazing children, tremendous family and friends and that helps a great deal.
After leaving, Lana asked us if we had made our final decision to adopt him. We of course said absolutely and that we would just go ahead and bring him home now. She giggled and said that that is what everyone says. I have no doubt! We then had to go back downtown to the city of Vlad to go to the notary. This was to make it official that we will adopt him and to sign a very important paper that will take him off the registry so that he will not be adopted by another family. Lana took us to a few shopping places downtown and then we treated her and the driver to Baskin Robbins. She said, “The we-there not so good for ice cream.” Justin explained that the weather is ALWAYS good for ice cream. She couldn’t argue with that.
I guess we will not be able to share his Russian or English names on the blog until everything is final in court after trip two. Sorry about that!
Today is our last day here. We will leave in a bit to visit the little guy. We will work with Lana to try to explain what is happening the best we can to a three year old. I am praying to God this morning that he give me the strength to keep my emotions in tack until after we leave the baby home, and also that he gives the lil guy peace in knowing that we will return soon. He knows no life other than the baby home. He has never spent one minute outside of institutional living. For the next couple/few months, we pray that he falls back into his routine and he is content. Of course selfishly we would like to think that he will miss us, but for his sake we hope that he does not.
We leave Vlad today to fly to Seoul then to LA then to Chicago. We will get on the morning train in Chicago and arrive home in Macomb at 10:30ish a.m. on Saturday – assuming we have no traveling drama. It will be a hard day for us, but we know that we are coming back to two amazing children, tremendous family and friends and that helps a great deal.
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Another good day
Yesterday was another great visit with our lil guy. He was excited to see us and was quick to begin playing with us. I think he knows all of the right things to do to find a place in Justin’s heart. Today he took the little tape measure we brought to measure him with and went around the room measuring everything. Justin thinks he holds the tape measurer as well as Grandpa Critter does – lol. He then found two toys to be his hammer and screwdriver and he went around ‘fixing’ things. You could tell Justin was quite proud of his skills. Lana and Irena (our interpreter and coordinator) tell us that Justin has golden hands. When you can build and fix things and do many different types of tasks you have golden hands.
During the visit we were more rambunctious in our style of play. We played a hide-n-seek type game and he got to ride on Justin’s shoulders. He began to laughing so hard – a true belly laugh. I hope that I got some of it on video. We haven’t had time to check it out yet. Today we go for our fourth visit and will have to tell them whether or not we accept the referral. We have found tremendous peace in our decision that this little guy is exactly who God had intended to be a part of our family. We think that Brady and Madison will adore him and that he will love them even more in return. So just as we have begun to get attached and allowing our hearts to soften it is almost time to go. I knew this was going to be the hard part. I have been told that it would be, but until you experience it yourself you have no idea how hard it is. I will say though that his baby home is very clean and the ladies that work there truly care for the children. I have no doubt in my mind that he will be cared for while he waits for our return.
During the visit we were more rambunctious in our style of play. We played a hide-n-seek type game and he got to ride on Justin’s shoulders. He began to laughing so hard – a true belly laugh. I hope that I got some of it on video. We haven’t had time to check it out yet. Today we go for our fourth visit and will have to tell them whether or not we accept the referral. We have found tremendous peace in our decision that this little guy is exactly who God had intended to be a part of our family. We think that Brady and Madison will adore him and that he will love them even more in return. So just as we have begun to get attached and allowing our hearts to soften it is almost time to go. I knew this was going to be the hard part. I have been told that it would be, but until you experience it yourself you have no idea how hard it is. I will say though that his baby home is very clean and the ladies that work there truly care for the children. I have no doubt in my mind that he will be cared for while he waits for our return.
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Visit Number 2
It was an exciting day around the hotel yesterday. Becky and Eric were able to have the two youngest children come and join them for the remaining of their visit. So they went from a family with no children to a family with three children in a short period of time. They sure have their hands full, but you can tell they are going to make great parents. The kids look so healthy and excited to be back together. It was also a very exciting day for Carol and Carl. Their little boy Garret got to come stay with them as well. Garret is in the same baby home and the SAME group as our lil guy. They got amazing pictures for us that we will be forever grateful for. We have a great group shot of the kids and of their sleeping area etc… Not everyone gets to see these areas and take pictures so to have them is priceless in our opinion. They were also able to report back what they observed our lil guy doing in his group setting. Which fortunately is how he behaves with Justin and I. He is very smiley and loves the camera! It is also great to see size comparison. Garret is four years old and Carl and Carol bought him an adorable little preppy outfit to bring him home (the hotel) in. It is a size 2T and it is a little big on him!!! We all agree that if you give us a couple of months in the States we will fatten them up real quick :o)
Today we got to go to his group’s room to pick him up to go to the visiting room. His face lit up when he saw me (Justin was in the bathroom!) and took my hand so that he could lead me to the visiting room. He started by giving me a hug and then he went to Justin and threw his arms around him. Now that was a site. This lil guy is seriously little, and he was determined to give Justin a hug he could feel! He picked up right where he left off yesterday. Got all of the toys out and dug in the bag for the Fruit Loops. He then went to my purse. I said Nyet (No) and he gave me a look of persistence and of course his heart melting smile. So I went over to supervise the purse rummaging. Interestingly he was very careful and didn’t pull anything out at first. Then he found what he was looking for. He pulled out the photo album we had brought with our pictures. He immediately took it out and went through it page by page again. He loves to look at pictures of Brady and Madison!
We had some animal puzzles and such that we wanted to work with him on so that we could get a better feel for his cognitive ability. It is hard though when you cannot explain to him what you want him to do. Our interpreter Lana stepped right in and helped us play with him for a bit so we could do these activities. He was able to match the animals in the puzzle, put the pieces back together, match colors on a gear toy we brought, etc… We have no doubt that he will be able to pick up on things quickly. Lana then left to ask a few questions for us. At this point we were feeling good about things other than the fact that he could not tend to a task for more than a minute it seemed – other than the photo album. We wondered if it was the overstimulation of the room, us being new, etc… But the educator in me just had to know. Can this lil guy sit still long enough to really tend to a learning task? So out comes the book. I put him on my lap and we began to look at the pictures of the animals. I made animals sounds. I assume cows still say Moo in Russian and cats say Meow! I was expecting him to want to get down immediately. Well guess what – he sat through the entire book. Lifted every flap and was so attentive. Yeah!!!!
Ok – sorry these entries get to be so long. I just want to remember all of this stuff. One more cute story. On the wall there are posters of their holiday routine and their daily routine. And they have used pictures of the children in the baby home for the poster. I didn’t think he was in any of the photographs so we used the Russian word for friends and he pointed to children in the photos. We asked Lana to ask him where he was in the pictures. Where was his photo? He got a big smile on his face. Pranced over and grabbed our digital camera off the couch and said that that was where his picture was. Tooo cute.
So I think it is becoming apparent that he has stolen our hearts. I cried in the hotel room when we returned. I am so thankful that God has held our hands through this journey. Believe me, you second guess every decision you make. For us, every doubt that we have and begin to worry about – God allows for something/someone to intervene and remove that doubt. We are emotionally exhausted. We miss home a lot. We are desperate to hug Brady and Madison. We are so thankful that this lil guy is so open to us. I am heartbroken that we will have to say goodbye on Friday and not be able to bring him home. It really is a humbling, exhausting, emotional, and amazing experience.
Love to all!
Justin and Heather
Today we got to go to his group’s room to pick him up to go to the visiting room. His face lit up when he saw me (Justin was in the bathroom!) and took my hand so that he could lead me to the visiting room. He started by giving me a hug and then he went to Justin and threw his arms around him. Now that was a site. This lil guy is seriously little, and he was determined to give Justin a hug he could feel! He picked up right where he left off yesterday. Got all of the toys out and dug in the bag for the Fruit Loops. He then went to my purse. I said Nyet (No) and he gave me a look of persistence and of course his heart melting smile. So I went over to supervise the purse rummaging. Interestingly he was very careful and didn’t pull anything out at first. Then he found what he was looking for. He pulled out the photo album we had brought with our pictures. He immediately took it out and went through it page by page again. He loves to look at pictures of Brady and Madison!
We had some animal puzzles and such that we wanted to work with him on so that we could get a better feel for his cognitive ability. It is hard though when you cannot explain to him what you want him to do. Our interpreter Lana stepped right in and helped us play with him for a bit so we could do these activities. He was able to match the animals in the puzzle, put the pieces back together, match colors on a gear toy we brought, etc… We have no doubt that he will be able to pick up on things quickly. Lana then left to ask a few questions for us. At this point we were feeling good about things other than the fact that he could not tend to a task for more than a minute it seemed – other than the photo album. We wondered if it was the overstimulation of the room, us being new, etc… But the educator in me just had to know. Can this lil guy sit still long enough to really tend to a learning task? So out comes the book. I put him on my lap and we began to look at the pictures of the animals. I made animals sounds. I assume cows still say Moo in Russian and cats say Meow! I was expecting him to want to get down immediately. Well guess what – he sat through the entire book. Lifted every flap and was so attentive. Yeah!!!!
Ok – sorry these entries get to be so long. I just want to remember all of this stuff. One more cute story. On the wall there are posters of their holiday routine and their daily routine. And they have used pictures of the children in the baby home for the poster. I didn’t think he was in any of the photographs so we used the Russian word for friends and he pointed to children in the photos. We asked Lana to ask him where he was in the pictures. Where was his photo? He got a big smile on his face. Pranced over and grabbed our digital camera off the couch and said that that was where his picture was. Tooo cute.
So I think it is becoming apparent that he has stolen our hearts. I cried in the hotel room when we returned. I am so thankful that God has held our hands through this journey. Believe me, you second guess every decision you make. For us, every doubt that we have and begin to worry about – God allows for something/someone to intervene and remove that doubt. We are emotionally exhausted. We miss home a lot. We are desperate to hug Brady and Madison. We are so thankful that this lil guy is so open to us. I am heartbroken that we will have to say goodbye on Friday and not be able to bring him home. It really is a humbling, exhausting, emotional, and amazing experience.
Love to all!
Justin and Heather
Monday, December 8, 2008
Tuesday’s Entry (part 2) – Monday in Vlad
What an emotional day! First Justin and I began our day in prayer and in our prayers we often ask God to please open doors for us that should be open and close those that should be closed. Please make it apparent to us, Lord, what you have in store for us. I feel that by asking for that guidance, certain things just fall into place without Justin and I having a chance to mess it up.
Lana - our interpreter, Irena – our agency rep, and Alec – our driver were supposed to pick us up at 10:30 a.m. to go to our MOE (minister of education) appointment. This is where we would officially be approved to see a child and be invited to visit an orphanage. Now, I didn’t post this earlier because I didn’t want our parents to freak out, but when we were picked up from the airport Lana told us that our documents had not arrived from Moscow yet. “Don’t worry He-There – Now is not the time to worry,” she said. Sure, sure I won’t worry a bit! Yeah right!!! So Justin and I were both sick to our stomachs that on Monday we would not be able to go see the lil guy. At 10:00 a.m. the phone in our room rings. Lana says to us the papers had night arrived yet, but they are supposed to be at the courier’s office by 11:30 so they are going to pick us up at 11 instead of 10:30. Again… “Don’t worry He-There – Now is not the time to worry,” she said. Ummmm I am thinking now is a great time to start to worry.
So at about 11:15 they arrived to pick us up. The city driving here is like no other. Different than Chicago for sure! It is best to just not pay attention. We stopped by the courier’s office and Irena came out with a huge smile on her face and said congratulations! Our papers arrived! We went to the MOE and answered some questions. We were told Tatiana was in a good mood today and we were lucky for that. When she saw the pictures in our homestudy of Brady and Madison she smiled and said beautiful children! Awww sucks – we sure think so :o) She showed us the picture of our lil guy and invited us to go visit him. So we were back in the van and off. Ohhhh – one more thing for future first time travelers to Vlad… ladies be sure to take Kleenex with you at all times. In the public restrooms, there are to toilet seats and no toilet paper. I get the no toilet seat thing. They say that you should not sit on public toilet seats anyway so why have them. The no toilet paper thing… I don’t get. Someone suggested that perhaps it just gets stolen. Not for sure – but always be prepared.
Because our day started so late with waiting for the papers to arrive, we could not go to the baby home right away because it was nap time. So we went back (we did exchange our money – that is a story for another entry!) to the hotel and ate lunch with Lana, Irena, Alec, and the Pittman family. I was surprised I could even eat. I was still nervous about our first visit. The drive to the baby home is about 45 minutes from the hotel. When we arrived, we had to put little blue things, like surgical hats, over our shoes so that we didn’t dirty the floor. We got the impression from the beginning that cleanliness is very valued there. We were taken upstairs to a room with a couch, two chairs, and some toys and waited for him to come in. When he came into the room he was so incredibly cute. He smiled from ear to ear and came right over to Justin and I and began to check us out. He was intrigued by all of the toys in the room and was anxious to start playing. I will say though, first timers reading this… be prepared for your child to look awkward in the clothing. The home put him in a visiting outfit which was blue cotton tights with shorts over the top, a long sleeved shirt tucked in, and brown shoes that are too small and look like something we would put on a little girl. It catches you off guard at first. But I have to say, his smile and eagerness to play with us helped get over the awkward look.
He is a little guy. Average for the baby home, but much smaller than a ‘typical’ three year old in the States. He has shown growth over the measurements we were given and that is a relief. He was able to sort objects, jump, blow bubbles, play with the cars, put objects together, etc… All of the ‘tests’ we had planned to put him through he just showed us on his own by playing with the toys. We brought Fruit Loops in a little package. They were a huge hit! Here was particular moment that stole my heart… We had put together an album of pictures of Brady, Madison, Justin, and I to share with him. We did not plan on getting it out the first day. He found it in the bag and pulled it out. He immediately took it over to a clear spot on the floor and started to look at it. He face lit up. His back was to Justin and when he got to a picture of Justin and I he got very excited, pointed to the picture and then turned to point to Justin and said PaPa. Wowza! I think it caught Justin off guard a bit.
Well our entries are too long now so I will stop for the day. We will go back and visit each day. We will need to have made our decision of whether or not to accept the referral by Thursday. We cannot share any pictures on here until after we return for our court date. We will share his name though in our entry after Thursday’s decision. We hope all is well back at home. We appreciate comments on the blog and emails. It is great to know that we are still in touch somewhat with things back in the States. We miss Brady and Madison a lot! We love you guys.
Dasvidanyia (Goodbye!)
Lana - our interpreter, Irena – our agency rep, and Alec – our driver were supposed to pick us up at 10:30 a.m. to go to our MOE (minister of education) appointment. This is where we would officially be approved to see a child and be invited to visit an orphanage. Now, I didn’t post this earlier because I didn’t want our parents to freak out, but when we were picked up from the airport Lana told us that our documents had not arrived from Moscow yet. “Don’t worry He-There – Now is not the time to worry,” she said. Sure, sure I won’t worry a bit! Yeah right!!! So Justin and I were both sick to our stomachs that on Monday we would not be able to go see the lil guy. At 10:00 a.m. the phone in our room rings. Lana says to us the papers had night arrived yet, but they are supposed to be at the courier’s office by 11:30 so they are going to pick us up at 11 instead of 10:30. Again… “Don’t worry He-There – Now is not the time to worry,” she said. Ummmm I am thinking now is a great time to start to worry.
So at about 11:15 they arrived to pick us up. The city driving here is like no other. Different than Chicago for sure! It is best to just not pay attention. We stopped by the courier’s office and Irena came out with a huge smile on her face and said congratulations! Our papers arrived! We went to the MOE and answered some questions. We were told Tatiana was in a good mood today and we were lucky for that. When she saw the pictures in our homestudy of Brady and Madison she smiled and said beautiful children! Awww sucks – we sure think so :o) She showed us the picture of our lil guy and invited us to go visit him. So we were back in the van and off. Ohhhh – one more thing for future first time travelers to Vlad… ladies be sure to take Kleenex with you at all times. In the public restrooms, there are to toilet seats and no toilet paper. I get the no toilet seat thing. They say that you should not sit on public toilet seats anyway so why have them. The no toilet paper thing… I don’t get. Someone suggested that perhaps it just gets stolen. Not for sure – but always be prepared.
Because our day started so late with waiting for the papers to arrive, we could not go to the baby home right away because it was nap time. So we went back (we did exchange our money – that is a story for another entry!) to the hotel and ate lunch with Lana, Irena, Alec, and the Pittman family. I was surprised I could even eat. I was still nervous about our first visit. The drive to the baby home is about 45 minutes from the hotel. When we arrived, we had to put little blue things, like surgical hats, over our shoes so that we didn’t dirty the floor. We got the impression from the beginning that cleanliness is very valued there. We were taken upstairs to a room with a couch, two chairs, and some toys and waited for him to come in. When he came into the room he was so incredibly cute. He smiled from ear to ear and came right over to Justin and I and began to check us out. He was intrigued by all of the toys in the room and was anxious to start playing. I will say though, first timers reading this… be prepared for your child to look awkward in the clothing. The home put him in a visiting outfit which was blue cotton tights with shorts over the top, a long sleeved shirt tucked in, and brown shoes that are too small and look like something we would put on a little girl. It catches you off guard at first. But I have to say, his smile and eagerness to play with us helped get over the awkward look.
He is a little guy. Average for the baby home, but much smaller than a ‘typical’ three year old in the States. He has shown growth over the measurements we were given and that is a relief. He was able to sort objects, jump, blow bubbles, play with the cars, put objects together, etc… All of the ‘tests’ we had planned to put him through he just showed us on his own by playing with the toys. We brought Fruit Loops in a little package. They were a huge hit! Here was particular moment that stole my heart… We had put together an album of pictures of Brady, Madison, Justin, and I to share with him. We did not plan on getting it out the first day. He found it in the bag and pulled it out. He immediately took it over to a clear spot on the floor and started to look at it. He face lit up. His back was to Justin and when he got to a picture of Justin and I he got very excited, pointed to the picture and then turned to point to Justin and said PaPa. Wowza! I think it caught Justin off guard a bit.
Well our entries are too long now so I will stop for the day. We will go back and visit each day. We will need to have made our decision of whether or not to accept the referral by Thursday. We cannot share any pictures on here until after we return for our court date. We will share his name though in our entry after Thursday’s decision. We hope all is well back at home. We appreciate comments on the blog and emails. It is great to know that we are still in touch somewhat with things back in the States. We miss Brady and Madison a lot! We love you guys.
Dasvidanyia (Goodbye!)
Tuesday’s Entry (part 1) – Sunday in Vlad
We have met another great couple – Carl and Carol. They are from Louisiana and they will be getting their son to stay here in the hotel with them today. Ironically their son is in the same baby home as ours so it great to compare and gather information. They had planned on going down to the city on Sunday and invited us to come with them. We knew it was our only chance to go so we were excited to accept the invitation. Unfortunately we had not exchanged any of our money to rubles yet and it is illegal for anyone here to accept U.S. dollars for payment. Carl and Carol graciously offered to lend us some rubles so that we could make the trip with them.
First thing I have noticed is that the Russian women that are out and about and working in public places are all very beautiful. They have a natural beauty to them and they dress very stylish, wear fur coats often times, and amazing boots. The ice and snow here is thick and the women still wear stiletto heeled boots. Our translator, Lana, gave us her theory as to why they always dress like that. She said that because of the many wars that the Russians have fought there are far fewer men than women. Women are in competition for men’s attention here. (Justin thinks that is pretty cool –lol)
Here are a few pictures from our excursion.
Justin and I outside a casino we passed. Of course we didn’t go in but we thought some folks back home might get a kick out of it!
This is where we got on and off the train in the city of Vladivostok.
Part of the city of Vlad
So if you know Justin well, you know that he is a huge fan of ice cream. He was quite pleased to see a Baskin Robbins nestled in with all of the Russian shops!
First thing I have noticed is that the Russian women that are out and about and working in public places are all very beautiful. They have a natural beauty to them and they dress very stylish, wear fur coats often times, and amazing boots. The ice and snow here is thick and the women still wear stiletto heeled boots. Our translator, Lana, gave us her theory as to why they always dress like that. She said that because of the many wars that the Russians have fought there are far fewer men than women. Women are in competition for men’s attention here. (Justin thinks that is pretty cool –lol)
Here are a few pictures from our excursion.
Justin and I outside a casino we passed. Of course we didn’t go in but we thought some folks back home might get a kick out of it!
This is where we got on and off the train in the city of Vladivostok.
Part of the city of Vlad
So if you know Justin well, you know that he is a huge fan of ice cream. He was quite pleased to see a Baskin Robbins nestled in with all of the Russian shops!
Saturday, December 6, 2008
We have arrived safe and sound
It is about 3:30 in the morning here on Sunday and 11:30 back home on Saturday. My internal clock is obviously messed up, but I am anticipating having plenty of time to nap. We are in a safe area and feel very comfortable (don’t worry mom and dad and all our wanna-be moms and dads); however for the simple fact that we are foreigners in another country we will not be able to go out at night and our agency rep and interpreter would prefer us not to go too far away from the hotel during the day. We are so fortunate that there are several adoptive families here right now - all of which are on trip number two. Some have their children with them as they are waiting out the required 10 day period for all decisions to be final. They are so incredibly helpful and informative. There is a room upstairs at the hotel called the White Rabbit room. This is where many of the families go around 5 or 6 to hang out with other English speaking families and debrief about the day’s visit to the baby home or to take a break from the four walls of the hotel room. This is a gold mine for us. There is better advice to be given than from those that have just completed the process that you are about to begin. Even though we have read book, blogs, internet sites, etc… nothing is better than a heart-to-heart with the experts.
Speaking of experts, another family from our agency is here right now as well. They are the Pittman family (their blog is linked on the left). They have adopted 3 siblings. Becky and Eric have taken us under their wing. In fact I think we are going to have to ask CHI to transfer part of our travel fee over to them! :o)
Today or tomorrow (however you look at it - Sunday) we are hoping to get train tickets to go downtown to look around. We have been told by the other families that this is completely safe to do. The hotel clerks will write us a note in Russian with our information so that if we get lost or anything we can show it and they will help us return to the hotel. Today will be our only chance to do this since our visits start on Monday and we will return too late to get downtown and back before dark. Hopefully it all works out and I will have some pictures to show you of Vlad.
Tomorrow, Monday, we will be picked up around 10:30 a.m. to go to the Department of Education to get our official invitation to meet ‘a’ child. We will then go to Artem (Artyem) to gather as much information as possible, and then finally meet this lil guy. We are beside ourselves with anticipation, anxiety, and excitement.
I promised Brady and Maddie that I would try to put pictures up everyday so they can see different things that have happened. I haven’t had much of a chance to take many pictures, but here are a few.
This is the four of us at the train station in Macomb on Thursday morning.
This is the Vlad Inn
And for a little humor… I am the gadget queen (no comments Tim or Corey!) and so here is a look at the mess I created when my darn blow dryer blew a fuse in the converter thingy we were using! For those future travelers – just get a European style hairdryer and forget the converter all together! Luckily we can us the adapters without the power converter for our other electronic devices so I did not have an anxiety attack!
Speaking of experts, another family from our agency is here right now as well. They are the Pittman family (their blog is linked on the left). They have adopted 3 siblings. Becky and Eric have taken us under their wing. In fact I think we are going to have to ask CHI to transfer part of our travel fee over to them! :o)
Today or tomorrow (however you look at it - Sunday) we are hoping to get train tickets to go downtown to look around. We have been told by the other families that this is completely safe to do. The hotel clerks will write us a note in Russian with our information so that if we get lost or anything we can show it and they will help us return to the hotel. Today will be our only chance to do this since our visits start on Monday and we will return too late to get downtown and back before dark. Hopefully it all works out and I will have some pictures to show you of Vlad.
Tomorrow, Monday, we will be picked up around 10:30 a.m. to go to the Department of Education to get our official invitation to meet ‘a’ child. We will then go to Artem (Artyem) to gather as much information as possible, and then finally meet this lil guy. We are beside ourselves with anticipation, anxiety, and excitement.
I promised Brady and Maddie that I would try to put pictures up everyday so they can see different things that have happened. I haven’t had much of a chance to take many pictures, but here are a few.
This is the four of us at the train station in Macomb on Thursday morning.
This is the Vlad Inn
And for a little humor… I am the gadget queen (no comments Tim or Corey!) and so here is a look at the mess I created when my darn blow dryer blew a fuse in the converter thingy we were using! For those future travelers – just get a European style hairdryer and forget the converter all together! Luckily we can us the adapters without the power converter for our other electronic devices so I did not have an anxiety attack!
Friday, December 5, 2008
Seoul, Korea
We have arrived in Korea safe and sound. It is almost 9:00 am on the 6th here and it is about 6:00 pm on the 5th back home. Thanks for all the emails and blog comments. We appreciate the support and being able to stay in touch with what is happening back home. We will start boarding our flight for Vlad in about 30 minutes. We are excited to get there, but getting really nervous as well. I think Justin and I have asked every parent between Chicago and Seoul how old their little one was that was traveling with them. We forget what 'three' looks like and find ourselves letting our minds wonder wildly about how our first visit to the baby home will go. We hope to have easy internet access at the Vlad Inn so we can chat with Brady and Maddie and update everyone. I have tried to upload a picture but the free internet access here won't let me :o) Until next time...
Justin and Heather
Justin and Heather
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
We are packed - I think
Exhausted but unable to sleep I thought I would get another post in before heading out tomorrow morning. It was crazy how a nesting feeling just overwhelmed me today. While completely procrastinating on getting the luggage packed, I got the house back in order, laundry all caught up, and baked cookies for Brady and Madison. We eventually did get into packing mode. I'll spare you the details, but it is difficult to pack when you have to watch the weight of your luggage. I am used to completely over packing just in case I am not in the mood for a particular outfit. That won't fly this time. I am also used to having a very handsome strong gentleman by the name of Justin carry my heavy luggage as well. Also not going to fly this time. So I had to make some tough choices tonight :o)!
I tried really hard to keep it together when putting the kids to bed. I want them to stay excited about the extra time they will have with the grandparents. I did pretty well. I was able to let the tears roll down my cheeks in silence as I gave them hugs and was able to slip out without making too much of a scene.
Our photobook we ordered from Walgreens did not arrive today. They are just positive it will arrive tomorrow. That does us no good. I guess if that is the worst that has happened so far then we should count our blessings. Now I have a new project for the hours of travel. I have gathered several of our photos and will put together my own album with both Russian and English words to leave our lil one.
Tomorrow morning my mom and Justin's mom are going to come and pick us up so that we can be in Macomb by 6:45 a.m. for the train. Brady and Madison will get to see us off and then be treated to an ever so healthy breakfast at McDonalds before school. We will fly out of O'Hare airport tomorrow evening (God willing) and arrive in LA. From LA we will fly to Seoul and then to Vlad.
Continued prayers and encouragment are greatly appreciated. We feel with every ounce of our being that what we are doing is right for our family, but we do know that there are going to be bumps along the way. We just hope they are little bumps and not huge potholes on path. Off we go!!! YEAH (or yee-haw as Justin would say!)
I tried really hard to keep it together when putting the kids to bed. I want them to stay excited about the extra time they will have with the grandparents. I did pretty well. I was able to let the tears roll down my cheeks in silence as I gave them hugs and was able to slip out without making too much of a scene.
Our photobook we ordered from Walgreens did not arrive today. They are just positive it will arrive tomorrow. That does us no good. I guess if that is the worst that has happened so far then we should count our blessings. Now I have a new project for the hours of travel. I have gathered several of our photos and will put together my own album with both Russian and English words to leave our lil one.
Tomorrow morning my mom and Justin's mom are going to come and pick us up so that we can be in Macomb by 6:45 a.m. for the train. Brady and Madison will get to see us off and then be treated to an ever so healthy breakfast at McDonalds before school. We will fly out of O'Hare airport tomorrow evening (God willing) and arrive in LA. From LA we will fly to Seoul and then to Vlad.
Continued prayers and encouragment are greatly appreciated. We feel with every ounce of our being that what we are doing is right for our family, but we do know that there are going to be bumps along the way. We just hope they are little bumps and not huge potholes on path. Off we go!!! YEAH (or yee-haw as Justin would say!)
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
They Arrived!
I am very happy to announce that our visas and passports arrived this morning safe and sound. What a huge relief! Justin and I bought a few toys to take with us this afternoon while Madison was at dance and Brady was at his piano lesson. We are taking things that will help us evaluate fine and gross motor skills as well as cognitive development. We have been given advice by other adoptive parents. So specifically we have gotten items that will show his ability to stack, sort, put together, and then of course playdough, cars, bubbles, etc... for fun. My mom sewed a super cute fleece blanket with matching pillow that fits into a little matching fleece bag. She is so talented (a skill I have never learned!) We are hoping that the photobook we put together will arrive tomorrow (thanks Mary for all the great pictures to chose from). We will be able to leave the album behind and the caregivers will go through it with the lil guy until our return on trip number two. There is still lots to do, but we are getting close to having everything gathered.
"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Philippians 4:13
This photo was taken this morning of Brady and Maddie standing in the first snow of the session which fell over the weekend. I thought my family in the southern states (Texas, Arkansas, Georgia and Florida) might like to see what they are missing out on! HaHa
"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." Philippians 4:13
This photo was taken this morning of Brady and Maddie standing in the first snow of the session which fell over the weekend. I thought my family in the southern states (Texas, Arkansas, Georgia and Florida) might like to see what they are missing out on! HaHa
Monday, December 1, 2008
Plugging along
Happy Birthday Justin! It is a memorable one. We both got a lot squared away at work today and several errands ran. We are both starting to feel like we are catching something (wouldn't have anything to do with stress and lack of sleep!) so we are going to try to head off the bug the best we can. They will not want us visiting the orphange with colds. Here is a picture of Brady and Madison from Thanksgiving with the costume that Maddie made at school. I am sick to my stomach about leaving them, but I know they are in great hands!
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