One of the scriptures at church today will be where I pull strength from this week. It is in Philippians 2:14 which was written by Paul while in prison, and it reads “Do everything without complaining or arguing.” I wrote just a few days ago about ‘the buzz’ being contagious. Well just as goodness is contagious so is negativity. Justin and I have felt like a little black cloud has slowly begun to form over us. Our hearts are aching to hold Blake. Brady and Madison speak about him as if he has always been a part of our family. They were dividing up pictures of animals they got from a magazine and they were making three piles. They decided that the snake couldn’t go into Blake’s pile because it might scare him. I typically see little acts like that and just smile at how sweet they are. Today I see those things and my heart hurts. To top it off we know that our wait has possibly only just begun. The realists in us keeps trying to convince each other that we could be MONTHS away from going back to Vlad. The dreamers in us tries to allow ourselves to believe that we will hear good news within a couple of weeks and be making arrangements for our return. We have had couples warn us that months two and three are so much harder than the first month. I completely agree.
So for now, I am going to be deliberate about keeping the negative thoughts from squashing our hopes. I am going to try to blow that little black cloud back to where it came from. I am going to take Paul’s advice and try to do everything without complaining or arguing. It is so very tempting for Justin and I to try to take control of this situation. We HAVE to remember that when we don’t surrender our will to God’s we always mess things up!
Tomorrow is a holiday so there is no school and I do not have to go to work. We will pick up the notarized report from the psychologist and a copy of his license to practice. Then we will head to the hospital to have blood drawn to make sure we haven’t contracted any crazy disease since the last time we had our blood tests – remember those results can only be 3 months old or you have to redo it in order to get a court date!! So hopefully by keeping busy we can prevent some of the negativity from seeping in.
3 comments:
Hi Heather!
Sorry to see that you have caught my latest affliction :( I am trying to turn a corner this week and be on the positive side.
Thanks for your message and support. I hope we meet up in Vlad, soon, as I'd love to give you a big hug!
Amy
Justin and Heather,
It is great the way your children have made Blake part of the family already. Our son did the same thing with his sister while we were waiting for our referral and also while we waited and waited and waited to return to Vlad to bring her home. Our wait was five months and that was one of the fastest returns for 2008. Hoping and praying you will beat our record.
It is important to find things to do while waiting and enjoy each moment you have today. Once Blake comes home, the first several weeks and months will fly by and the adjustments begin as the kids each adapt to the changes that will occur.
I was so busy staying on top of the never ending paper trial, but my husband had such a hard time waiting to return for our daughter that he went out and bought a boat that we called "Distraction". We had planned on the boat either this year or next year, but the "wait" moved up the purchase.
I like reading your blog because it encourages my walk with the LORD!. Great Job, Keep Writing!!
One of the Lincoln teachers gave me your blog address recently and I've been following your progress as you wait to go back to get Blake. My daughter and son-in-law adopted a little girl from Russia when she was 16 months old. She's 4 now and is the joy of our lives. I know how hard the wait was for them. They met her in December and were able to go back to get her in March. Hang in there!!!
Post a Comment